HI again!

HI! I haven't written for a long time but I have an excuse for that. When I started writing, I never finished my post because I couldn't think of anything more to write.

Now, however I am going to tell you about a recent experience I had.

You know when you have friends, you don't want to act stupid so that they don't leave you? Well, I always felt like that when I was with them. I realized, however, that this should not be like that. I should be myself when I'm with friends but not an invisible ghost afraid to show its true identity.

I had a big fight with one of my best friends (let's call her Y)because I greeted someone she doesn't like and according to her, "does not give a shit about me." C'mon. I think I am the

one who decides whether to like and greet someone or not, not she. After that, she stopped talking to me and along with that, other friends of mine stopped talking to me as well because they decided to take her side. I think that no one should take any sides because I don't want to make them hate her but just want to keep my friendship with them. It doesn't matter anymore... With this experience I realized who my true friends are and who like the real me. It looks like that for my friend, it was too big cost to pay, to talk to me again, the 'not cool' one.

Of course Y blocked me in facebook and skype which shows her not caring anymore for me. She passes me if we met as if we do not know each other.

Who cares? I don't care anymore and it looks like she doesn't care anymore as well.

I like who I am now without feeling regrets of what I've done. I shouldn't, right?

I do not search for approval or something but just want to share my

disappointment in the ones I thought loved and cared for me. I trusted them and when there was an opportunity, they decided to leave me. OK...

They lose.

After all, shouldn't we be grateful for those friends who stay rather than for those who leave us?

P.S. Listen to this song. It's wonderful.

Another P.S. :D Soon I will tell you about my secong experience in "Open Microphone" and if you want to give me ideas about future posts, be my guests. ((:

Life..

The same day. It is the same as yesterday, the day before yesterday, etc. and tomorrow will be the same, too. I feel that my life will continue the same way and there won't be a moment that has the power to change this monotonousness.

I get up in the morning and I know what to do, what will happen and so on. I know the order of the events that day and along with that the problems I'm going to face. I don't want it to be that way. There should be an exciting moment that will make you feel the difference, that will make you feel the freedom. People should enjoy their life as much as they can so that they don't regret that they have missed something. Sometimes, they need to risk in order to get more. I have a perfect quote for that -

"Life is so short... Sometimes, even one miracle is enough." Krasimir Bachkov.

People think that if something is, for example, forbidden they shouldn't try it but they are wrong. Of course, you shouldn't search for strong sensations but you should strive to do things that in a matter of time would increase your happiness, that will make your life interesting. After all, this is your life, isn't it?

a person ...don't judge him before you see his soul...

Think about people as people. You see a person and make conclusions before even meeting him because of his appearance or what people have talked about him. Don't you think that's unfair for him? He may not look the way you want him to, but that doesn't mean to check him off of your "good" list.

The soul of a person shows who he really is. I don’t say that you have to see everybody’s soul before creating an opinion about him, but at least try. Perhaps, you will be amazed of the result because that person could become a very close person of yours.

I’ve made wrong conclusions and now I understand that. I have judged people because of their appearance and what people have talked about them. Thankfully, I have “seen” their soul and made my own opinion by them without being influenced by other people.

What I suggest is not to talk or think bad things about person you don’t know because he may appear to be a good one. You will be pleased with the decision you have made when you get to know him. (of course, it may appear that the person is just as the others have talked but that doesn’t mean that he doesn’t have a purpose to do so)

time.

Take a picture, take a painting, take a book. Look at it, try to read it. Think about it. Now wait ten years.

And now , ten years later, look at it. It feel s quite different, isn't it? You feel many different things from your previous observations.

Time changes things. Not the paintings or the books have changed, it is you that has. People change the way they look at them. At first, you thought it was just a stupid book that you threw away. Later, you think that is the greatest book you've ever read.

Of course, we change... we are meant to be. If we didn't change we would have stayed the same babies who could only cry and do anything else.

Sometimes, I think how everybody changes. There are moments when I realize that one who has been, for example, a shy person, has turned into a social one.

I state all these things to say that time changes things. You may think that you will never get over a pain but several years later you realize that haven't thought about it for a while.

All we are...

What we are is a very strange question. You may ask how can I not know who I am. I will tell you. Everybody acts differently in front of different people. They change in the situation they are put. Nobody knows who he is... Everybody acts the way other people act who act the way other people act and in that way a cycle is made in which everybody is nobody.

When you realize that the way you've acted in front of some of your friends is not a way you like, it is not who you are, it is somebody else. When you understand that, you will try to avoid all the things you've done against your will so that you can be a "cool" one. I would tell you to find the friends with whom this secret in told and is not hidden anymore, who you care about and who care about you.

Can you look at your old pictures? Can you look at yourself? You will think how could you have looked that way, dressed that way, acted that way. After you have done that can you think of the changes you have made in order to look like you look now. Believe me, you will think about the people that have changed you and not how you changed yourself. Everybody imitates everybody and in that way everybody is nobody. There is not a unique person in dressing, acting, etc., there are only copies of one.

You will think how can you change this. You want to be a unique one and not a copy? In the way you look, you have been influenced by others, in the way you act, you , again, have been influenced by others. Then you will ask how can everybody tell you that you are unique when you are not. This is what I will tell you. Everybody is unique in his own way. He might be influenced by others but will always have one part which is only his, which nobody could get, which nobody could imitate. It will be like a secret which will never be revealed to anybody but you...

Tyger! Tyger! burning bright....

A week ago there was an "Open Mic" event in my school. There everybody shared their talent, either by singing or beat-boxing, or even reading a poem (which could be theirs but could be another person's that has inspired them).

I participated in the "singing part" with two boys- Stefcho and Toni. Stefcho beat-boxed, Toni sang the verses and I sang the chorus. I was so stressed that you cannot imagine. I had to sing only the chorus which was two lines and was so anxious. I stood there next to my friends and could feel my whole body shaking and getting hotter and hotter. Thank God, there were my friends. They were standing right next to me and were calming me down. At some point, it worked but after that came our turn and I became even more nervous. We went in front of the audience and I could imagine my face-full with fear. Stefcho started his part and Toni joined him. I could feel all the faces looking at me. I knew that my part was coming and had to handle myself. I looked towards my friends and there they were, standing so late in school for me. Then I heard the last word of the verse and I started to sing. I opened my mouth and the words just went out of there. Some of my friends stood up and started clapping and my confidence came back to me. When I finished, Toni continued with the second verse. I was so pleased that hadn't lost my conscience (;d). When we finished, I could hear the clapping of the whole audience and something in my made me smile. There was it, my minute of fame.

During that "concert" there were a lot of things that I liked. The two poems I most liked were one, written by a student whose name is Deya, and the other one, written by the poet William Blake and was read by a teacher in the school.

The poem written by Deya cannot be described. It was just an expression of her feelings and she had done that in such a beautiful way.

The other poem was "The Tyger." The teacher that presented it read the text with such strength, with power in his voice. He made the audience repeat the first verse several times till we learn it. I still remember it. This poem filled me with so different feeling. You have to feel it in order to understand it and that is what the teacher made us. We took part in the reading and in that way, I believe, everybody understood it.

"Open Mic" event was a very interesting, intriguing event, that I would really like to be repeated.

Here I will post you the poem "The Tyger."

The Tyger

Tyger! Tyger! burning bright,
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Could frame thy fearful symmetry?

In what distant deeps or skies
Burnt the fire in thine eyes?
On what wings dare he aspire?
What the hand dare seize the fire?

And what shoulder, and what art?
Could twist the sinews of thy heart?
And when thy heart began to beat,
What dread hand, and what dread feet?

What the hammer? What the chain?
In what furnace was thy brain?
What the anvil? What dread grasp
Dare its deadly terrors clasp?

When the stars threw down their spears,
And watered heaven with their tears,
Did he smile his work to see?
Did he who made the Lamb, make thee?

Tyger! Tyger! burning bright,
In the forests of the night,
What immortal hand or eye
Dare frame thy fearful symmetry?


William Blake

You have control...

Have you ever felt that you can't control your life? Have you ever felt as if something has already made your decisions and you're walking on a path that has already been created for you?

I feel that way many times. I feel that everything that had happened to me isn't bad at all, and it will be getting worse and worse. I feel that my control over my life is as tiny as a flake and I could do nothing to make it bigger. I feel as if somebody or something gives me orders which I follow. When everything this comes to my mind, I could feel the tears falling down my face and when I ask myself the question "What's the reason for my crying?", the answer is that I don't know. The feeling of the loss of control could break you. The feeling that you can't change anything can make you feel pain.

The reason why I'm writing these things is that I want to tell people that everybody has felt that way. I am not a philosopher or anything like this but just want to say that everybody has control over his life. All the decisions that you make during your whole life matter. All these decisions are made by your thoughts, by your mind, by you. The loss of control lasts just one moment and after that it is you again who controls the parade. You should not let thoughts, which aim you to the idea that you have no control over, to enter your mind because in that way you will feel as if you aren't in your body, as if you are intruder in this world.

You should know that even if you have not made the right choice, it was you who made that choice, you were the one that took that path. Everybody looses control from time to time, but always gets it back... (:

Music.. one republic!

In this post I'm writing about one of my favorite bands-One republic for which all I could say is that their songs have really powerful lyrics and that the group is just great!

I have a lot of favorite songs but the two that I just love are "Mercy" and "All We Are". The meaning of the lyrics is so strong. When I listen to these songs, I feel as if I am part of them. These people, these musicians should understand the strength of their music, they should know how they influence people. The rhythm of the songs is just great and I have nothing to criticize.

I will give you information about how the band started, some of its albums, etc. The band was formed in 2002 in Colorado. Its first name was "Republic" but after that they changed it to "One Republic". The band became famous with its singles "Apologize" ( sang with Timbaland and was released in 2007 ) and "Stop and Stare" (which was released in 2008). The band has two albums and several singles. The two albums are "Dreaming Out Loud" (which was released in 2007) and "Waking Up" (which was released in 2009). The group said that they are making a two new singles called "Everybody Loves Me" and "Good Life" which are expected to be released that year (2010).

The current members of the group are Ryan Tedder (who is a lead vocal, plays piano, guitar,keyboards, and tambourine), Zach Filkins (who plays the guitar, drums, viola and sometimes sings the vocal), Drew Brown (who plays the guitar,bass guitar, and glockenspiel), Eddie Fisher (who plays drums) and Brent Kutzle.

Here I will give you the lyrics of the song "All We Are"

All We Are

I tried to paint you a picture,
the colors were all wrong
Black and white didn't fit you
And all along, you were shaded with patience,
your strokes of everything that I need just to make it

And I believe that I could tear you apart
but it won't break anything that you are, you are
We'll say our goodbyes you know it's better that way
We won't break, we won't die
It's just a moment of change
All we are, all we are, is everything that's right
All we need, all we need, our love is at a bind

I walked a minute in your shoes,
they never would've fit
I figured there's nothing to lose
I need to get some perspective
on these words before I write them down
You're an island and my ship is running ground

I could tear your apart,
but it won't break anything that we are, we are
We'll say our goodbyes you know its better that way
We won't break, we won't die
It's just a moment of change
All we are, all we are, is everything that's right
All we need all we need, our love is at a bind

Every single day that I can breathe,
you changed my philosophy
I'm never gonna let you pass me by
So don't say your goodbyes
you know its better that way
We won't break, we won't die
It's just a moment of change (x2)
All we are, all we are, is everything that's right
All we need, all we need, our love is at a bind

Top 10 films of 2009.

In this post I am going to include my ten most favorite films of 2009 that make me smile.

1. The Time Traveler's Wife - This film is one of my favorites. It tells a love story between a woman and a man who travel around time.

2. Avatar - This film has many effects that are done so well that you could believe that everything is happening in real.

3. Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince - I am sure that you have heard of Harry Potter. He is a magician who has to "fight" against the Dark Lord Voldermort. This is the six film of the saga and only one is left (there are seven books on which the films are based on).

4. Angels and Demons - This film tells an amazing story about a iluminator who kills only priests. It is based on the book Angels and Demons written by Dan Brown.

5. The Hangover - This film is a very funny comedy. It tells a story of four man who celebrate a hangover before the wedding in Las Vegas. The broom is lost after a crazy night in that sin city and the three other man start searching for him. Their actions and the bride's phone calls for the broom are very funny and I recommend you to watch that film.

6. Coco Before Chanel - This film is a documentary of the life of Coco Chanel. In the film, she goes through a lot of difficulties to earn her place in life.

7. The Pink Panther 2 - This filml is a veery funny one. It tells a story of our favorite detective searching for the robber of national treasures.

8. Year One - Another comedy! The film tells a story of two caveman who decide to go out of the cave and to explore the world. The film is full of jokes and is a funny one.

9. X-men Origins: Wolverine - The film is something like a "background information" how the wolverine became the wolverine. There are three other films about X-men just like "X-men," and others.

10. The Princess and The Frog - This is the new Walt Disney's story! It is an animation but a very interesting one. The film is about a girl who kisses a frog but the unexpected happens and she turns into a frog and together with the enchanted prince they need to find the magician who can break that curse.

I recommend to you these films because they are very interesting to watch and you will see that you will enjoy even the ones that you thought were not for you. (:

Happy New Year!!!

3...2....1.... Happy New Year!

Well I am sure that you remember the counting of the coming new year. I was sitting on the chair and was eating my slice of bread and then I saw on the TV the president's message. He was talking about seven minutes and after that a clock appeared on the screen which showed the arrow of the seconds moving towards the twelve. And there was it 3,2,1 and the screaming of my parents "Happy New Year!' and I heard me screaming too and then the screaming of the people on the screen. Oh.. what a night. After that there was the banitsa (it is a meal made of cheese and a lot of other things that I cannot explain) with the wishes on toothstick. This is a tradition in my country in which everybody chooses a slice of the banitsa and there is a wish on a stick which tells you different things like "The new year will bring you a lot of cheer" and that wish is said to be true for the new year.

A lot of people on this day have spent with their family or with their frends. Many people have counted till 12 for the coming new year. They have expected it with pleasure and here it came. Usually, the new year is a new beginning, a new start . Many people make wishes for themselves that they are going to do something, the promise they will do it. Such as "For the next year I promise that will stop smoking" but this does not happen only if you wish or promise it but you have to try what you have said, you should try to achieve it.

I wish Happy New Year to all!!!
((: